Winter is finishing with a flurry of above average temperatures, allowing Cinniapolitans to bask in the rare warm winter sun. Let’s all keep that in mind when the colder Spring air returns for several more weeks. The polar air lingers through much of June again this Spring, according to CNPS Meteorology forecast. “We’re forecasting heavy cloud cover this Spring. Currently, our models agree that the … Continue reading Spring 2025 Forecast
Dolly is here to advise the Cinniapolis community and answer any questions with grace and honesty. Here is today’s question: Q: Dear Dolly, this is less of an inquiry for advice and more or a warning that I am on a mission to unmask you. After decades of passing judgment on Cinniapolitans character and every day actions, you will be exposed as an artificially generated … Continue reading Dear Dolly: Truth Sleuth
In 2025, Stars and Stripes Airlines is the #1 airline to get you out of the Cinniapolis cold and into the warmth of Salad Isles! This Spring Break and every day the sun rises, freedom flies with S&S Air. Our limited-edition Spring Break meat flights are back by popular demand!! Each flight will feature a meat buffet in place of first-class seating. Our planes are outfitted to … Continue reading Can’t Miss Spring Break Deals!
Last night, Walesburg Mayor Winston lifted the meat ban that has been effective in Cinniapolis since Sept 2023. “Now that we forge our own path, we will eat our own foods too. The essential nutrients from meat are unmatched in the genetically modified products available today. To our meat suppliers, let me be the first to say, welcome back! Walesburg is open for business and … Continue reading Let Them Eat Meat!
Last month, the citizens of the newly seceded Walesburg elected Annabelle Winston as their first Mayor. Mayor Winston has taken several official actions to position Walesburg as a destination for families and businesses. This morning, the Mayor opened her media session with the announcement that the official spelling of Walesburg will be changed to its original spelling of Whalesburg. This seemingly innocuous move quickly gained … Continue reading Mayor Winston Official Act Spells Trouble
Walesburgians elected Ms. Annabelle Winston as their first Mayor to form the first ever government of Walesburg. Ms. Winston secured 78% of the vote holding off challenger Gerard Gonzalez. “Today is a proud day for Walesburg. We are an independent entity and no longer oppressed by the corporate and political elites from the northeast,” said Ms. Winston, referring to Cinniapolis. “My team is already working … Continue reading Mayor of Walesburg Elected
Cinniapolis residents, prepare for a winter that’s started out frosty and unpredictable! According to Lead Meteorologist Fran Dimple, this Winter will bring a mix of wintry whiteouts and seasonal challenges as temperatures are expected to fluctuate significantly throughout the season. Winter kicked off with temperatures averaging in the mid-30s, dipping into the 20s overnight. Snow lovers rejoiced, as a light snowfall fell early in the … Continue reading Winter 2025 Forecast
This season had to end some time. There can only be one champion. There are a plethora of other cliches and slogans to ease the sting of losing but none seem appropriate after last week’s State Championship loss. The Cinni Prep Catfish gave this city one heck of an Autumn. After finishing the regular season with a 6-3 record, the Catfish entered the State playoffs … Continue reading Cinni Prep Football Falls Short in Bid for State Title
Cinni Prep and Larkin Central have each been graduating students for nearly 100 years. Cinni Prep first opened its doors in 1924. Larkin Central wasn’t too far behind, graduating its first 4-year class in 1932. Each launched their football programs in the 1940s. But tomorrow night, they will meet for the first time ever for the opportunity to advance to the High School Football State … Continue reading Catfish Prep to Host Historic Quarterfinal Game
On October 2nd, Walesburg voted to secede from Cinniapolis. On October 24th, the Cinniapolis City Council officially approved the secession, which will be effective February 1st, 2025. One of the first measures of the independent township will be electing their Mayor. Just one candidate has officially declared, but Cinniapolis Chorus sources agree that their will likely be 3 additional potential candidates. Here is our breakdown … Continue reading After Successful Secession, Walesburg Mayoral Race Takes Shape
Cinniapolis Chorus 