Tag: karen jefferson

Special Report

Ghost of Ray Cinniapolis Reported Along Lake Sinnissippi as Unexplained Tides Continue

Residents along Lake Sinnissippi are reporting multiple sightings of what they describe as the ghost of Ray Cinniapolis, the city’s namesake industrialist, coinciding with a series of unexplained nighttime tidal waves that have damaged property and eroded several sections of shoreline. Local authorities confirmed that at least four separate wave events have occurred since late September, each between 2:00 a.m. and 3:30 a.m. Multiple witnesses … Continue reading Ghost of Ray Cinniapolis Reported Along Lake Sinnissippi as Unexplained Tides Continue

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Business

Home Gardening Trend Accelerating in Cinniapolis

Over the past several years, homes in Cinniapolis here and there have adopted home gardens. The trend began with the onset of the pandemic coinciding with prime growing season in Cinniapolis. As the days, weeks, months, and now years have passed, there are more green garden roofs than ever when walking through local neighborhoods. During a stroll through Reunion, one might see tomatoes, strawberries, or … Continue reading Home Gardening Trend Accelerating in Cinniapolis

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Events

St. Boris Halloween Fest Resurrected!

Hallelujah! The St. Boris Halloween Fest has returned! For the first time since 2019, St. Boris Parish is sponsoring a community Halloween celebration Saturday October 26th. This festival was held annually through 2019. After 5 long years, the fest is back to kick off the holiday season. “The plan to restore this celebration has been in the works for a bit now, ” said Karen … Continue reading St. Boris Halloween Fest Resurrected!

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Weather

Cinni Cindi Spots a Shadow, Maybe

It’s Groundhog Day here in Cinniapolis, which means our local representative from the groundhog community, Cinni Cindi, has made her annual appearance outside the Cinniapolis Post Office to reveal if Cinniapolis is in the crosshairs for another six-weeks of Winter or if Spring is just around the corner. Naturally, there is conflicting information coming out of the sunrise ceremony. CNPS TV reports that Cindi did in … Continue reading Cinni Cindi Spots a Shadow, Maybe

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Sports

’22 Derby Results Upheld

A committee of City Council members heard testimony from concerned parties over the past several days regarding the controversial photo finish from last Summer’s Cinniapolis Derby. The committee found no new compelling information to pursue the release of the photo finish to the public. After an initial public backlash at the decision to withhold the photo, tensions seemed to have eased over the past several … Continue reading ’22 Derby Results Upheld

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Sports

Cinni Prep Football Misses Postseason Again

Head Coach Benny Marmalade summed up this season succinctly, “When we were good, we were great. When we were bad, we were awful,” he said. Leave it to classic, non-specific coachspeak to put a stamp on another promising yet ultimately disappointing season for the Catfish. The team missed out on the postseason for the sixth straight season and local supporters are starting to loudly question … Continue reading Cinni Prep Football Misses Postseason Again

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Sports

Formal Investigation Announced into Derby Finish

The Cinniapolis City Council has agreed to form a committee to investigate the finish from the 2022 Cinniapolis Derby. This year’s finish was hotly contested both on the track and off the track. The photo finish image was never released or leaked to the public, causing massive outcry from losing bettors and the general public. Conspiracies have consumed horse-racing enthusiasts all over town. “It was … Continue reading Formal Investigation Announced into Derby Finish

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Entertainment

St. Boris Holding Autumn Auction

St. Boris Church will be holding its fourth annual Autumn Auction to help raise funds for the parish and elementary school. Last year, the proceeds from the auction were used to purchase new toilets for the school and church. Money well-spent if nature calls one while in the Lord’s house. There were a wide range of items and experiences to bid on last year, including … Continue reading St. Boris Holding Autumn Auction

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Special Report

Cinniapolis Safety Gets a Helping Hand

The Cinniapolis Safety Department task force recently closed an investigation into the local narcotics trade that resulted in 26 indictments and the arrest of the alleged queenpin of the illicit activities, Annabelle Winston. Known to her peers and customers as “Painfree-B”, Ms. Winston is the alleged leader of the local narcotics distribution network. This piece of news is extraordinary on its own. The CSD has … Continue reading Cinniapolis Safety Gets a Helping Hand

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