The newly formed Cinniapolis Safety Department task force assigned to stop retail smash and grab operations at pharmacies, clothing stores and jewelry stores may have to consider expanding into eye wear. Unfortunately, smash and grabs have taken on a new endeavor. Over the past two weeks, 4 local eye care centers have been hit by robbers making off with high-end sunglasses and designer frames.

The thieves have been utilizing the cover of late night darkness and the power of hammers to break the glass doors. They proceed to grab as many pairs of designer frames their backpacks can hold. They speed away before authorities respond to the triggered store alarms. So far, no arrests have been made for these thefts.

When reached for comment, Martha’s EyeCare owner Dr. Granderson opined, “The real epidemic is rampant unemployment exacerbated by an inattentive government looking to secure their votes from wealthy lobbyists and donors rather than public safety,” in reference to unpopular measures taken to combat the pandemic.

CSD officers are searching for suspects that have stolen nearly $13,000 worth of eyeglass frames.