Local health insurance agencies confirmed to the Chorus that they are no longer offering coverage for non-essential cosmetic surgeries. This change goes into effect January 1st, 2025. The change is a result of years-long lobbying efforts led by special interest groups.

“It’s a disgrace, it’s naive, but most importantly it’s disappointing,” said Dr. Sherman Fielgüt, founder and owner of Elevate Cosmetic Center (ECC). “My life’s mission is to preserve and promote the human spirit. Our work at the ECC helps individuals look as good as humanly possible, improving their mental health to feel as good inside as they look outside. This irrational, uninformed decision hurts many, many humans in their search for inner and outer beauty.”

While Dr. Fielgüt is disheartened by this news, others weren’t so down about the news. Father Ned Appleton, Pastor at St. Boris, celebrated the announcement, “It’s a great day for Cinniapolis. We hope and expect to see this trend spread throughout the land. Our body is God’s vessel. To unnecessarily alter the appearance out of mental weakness is sacrilegious,” said Father Ned.

Aside from the obvious black and white viewpoints of each end of the spectrum, there will be patients left in the gray zone having to deal with the trauma of an accident while simultaneously having to prove their surgery is essential.

“It’s tortuous,” said Dr. Fielgüt. “Many of the procedures at the ECC remove scars or help them blend in with natural body. Many other procedures alleviate pain. Mental pain is just as severe as physical pain. Under these new provisions, these surgeries will have to be legitimized as ‘essential’, drumming up trauma and stress for the individual who only wants to feel better,” he said.

Father Ned disagrees, “Walking around town, sometimes it’s hard to distinguish if I’m in a civilized human society or backstage at a carnival show. Humans are meant to endure suffering, both physical and mental. I understand the journey is difficult but God’s creations are far more resilient than we can understand or fathom. We don’t need a witch doctor or corrupt media convincing us we are not good enough. God tells us everyday that we are good enough, we are durable enough, and most importantly to reject the devil’s temptation to alter our journey to Him,” said Father Ned.

An insurance spokesperson assured the Chorus that these changes are not as drastic as the surrounding hearsay, “These changes are not meant to deny any person their medical freedom. They are simply guardrails to limit those that abuse cosmetic procedures. Those folks must be saved from themselves because profit-chasing doctors will not do that for them.”

For those contemplating a cosmetic procedure, it might be best to get it scheduled by the year’s end to avoid leaving your well-being in the hands of insurance carriers.